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The Courage to Be Disliked Reading Notes
"The Courage to Be Disliked" not only analyzes the root causes of various troubles in life, but also provides corresponding countermeasures to help readers better understand themselves and interpersonal relationships, and how to apply Adler's psychological theory in daily life. Improve your life.
Edited at 2024-04-30 00:40:45- One Hundred Years of Solitude Character Relationship Chart
One Hundred Years of Solitude is the masterpiece of Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Reading this book begins with making sense of the characters' relationships, which are centered on the Buendía family and tells the story of the family's prosperity and decline, internal relationships and political struggles, self-mixing and rebirth over the course of a hundred years.
- One Hundred Years of Solitude Character Relationship Chart
One Hundred Years of Solitude is the masterpiece of Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Reading this book begins with making sense of the characters' relationships, which are centered on the Buendía family and tells the story of the family's prosperity and decline, internal relationships and political struggles, self-mixing and rebirth over the course of a hundred years.
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Project management is the process of applying specialized knowledge, skills, tools, and methods to project activities so that the project can achieve or exceed the set needs and expectations within the constraints of limited resources. This diagram provides a comprehensive overview of the 8 components of the project management process and can be used as a generic template for direct application.
The Courage to Be Disliked Reading Notes
- One Hundred Years of Solitude Character Relationship Chart
One Hundred Years of Solitude is the masterpiece of Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Reading this book begins with making sense of the characters' relationships, which are centered on the Buendía family and tells the story of the family's prosperity and decline, internal relationships and political struggles, self-mixing and rebirth over the course of a hundred years.
- One Hundred Years of Solitude Character Relationship Chart
One Hundred Years of Solitude is the masterpiece of Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Reading this book begins with making sense of the characters' relationships, which are centered on the Buendía family and tells the story of the family's prosperity and decline, internal relationships and political struggles, self-mixing and rebirth over the course of a hundred years.
- Project Management Process Template
Project management is the process of applying specialized knowledge, skills, tools, and methods to project activities so that the project can achieve or exceed the set needs and expectations within the constraints of limited resources. This diagram provides a comprehensive overview of the 8 components of the project management process and can be used as a generic template for direct application.
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"The Courage to Be Disliked" Reading Notes
Your misfortunes are all due to your own choices
Unconscious choices lead to unfortunate results. Subconsciously, they are affected by various influences from the external environment. In essence, they are the protection of self-awareness.
The unfortunate status quo can be changed
Assumptions and fantasies can bring false satisfaction. Actual change requires courage and determination.
Changing the status quo requires courage
All troubles come from interpersonal relationships
All shortcomings and advantages are found through comparison with others.
To a certain extent, we correct shortcomings in our character in order to meet other people's expectations of ourselves and gain a sense of self-satisfaction.
In relationships, getting hurt and hurting others is inevitable
What is inferiority complex
Inferiority is universal. Wherever there are people, there will be inferiority.
Inferiority promotes us to pursue excellence and become a better version of ourselves to a certain extent.
Inferiority complex is negative and serves as an excuse for people to be weak and unwilling to make changes.
The more conceited a person is, the inferior he or she is
Arrogant people enjoy the "privilege of weakness" and create themselves into a weak state, thereby gaining the sympathy of others and getting rid of the constraints of others.
Understand the subconscious mind behind various emotions
power struggle
Some people are fabricating anger. Anger is a tool for others to surrender and prove their competitiveness.
No need to prove who is right or wrong
Think that you are right and don’t care about what others think that you don’t agree with.
The pursuit of superiority is not accomplished by competing with others
The only person you really care about the most is yourself
What others say about you cannot substantially affect your life. Your lifestyle is determined by yourself.
The evaluation of others is one-sided, so different people will evaluate you differently.
Your own life is your own decision
Three major issues in life
Relationships come in different distances and depths
The subject of love
treat each other as equals
Less restraint and being able to sincerely bless each other is love
Able to experience the state of "you can get along with this person without any restraint"
Friendship topics
Friends are not in quantity, but in quality
The reason why most friends are called friends is determined by their environment. If you stay away from campus or the workplace, the friendship will weaken.
If you want to make more friends, just go to a different environment.
Work topic
Anyone who is not autistic can have a work partner
After the work is over, the simple relationship fades away
Working with a partner is essentially a simple collaboration to complete a more complex task
basic ability
Self-reliance - I am capable
Live in harmony with society—everyone is my partner
separation of subjects
Separate yourself from other people's issues
Issues about trust and respect
Choosing to trust others is your own issue, and how to face your trust is others' issue
You don't need to bear the burden of other people's distrust. This is also considered interfering in other people's issues. If it is necessary to intervene, you will also assume some of the responsibilities of others
If someone hates you for no reason, you don’t have to cater to them, you just need to draw clear boundaries
parents and children
Children do not live to satisfy their parents’ expectations
Parents are dissatisfied with their children's behavior and engage in moral kidnapping. This is a problem for the parents themselves.
How to solve interpersonal problems
Don’t interfere in other people’s projects, and don’t let others interfere in your own projects.
The separation of subjects does not give up the warmth of communication
Separation of subjects is only the starting point for solving interpersonal problems
Interfering in other people's issues must have good and bad consequences. Therefore, intervening in the subject will not 100% achieve good interpersonal relationships.
The separation of topics is just to allow yourself to break out of the constraints of thinking, so as to better solve problems from each other's perspectives.
Choose the path of recognition from others or choose the path of freedom without recognition
If you choose the former, your life will be full of lies. Because different people recognize different scoring standards. We get caught up in the rush to meet the expectations of different people.
If you choose the latter, there will be people in your life who hate you. Because most of your life choices are not determined by the people around you, but through your own understanding, you make thoughtful choices that are best for you.
The end point of interpersonal relationships is a sense of community
Not just people, but everything in the universe can have a sense of community with themselves. A cat, a potted plant...
Turn your obsession with yourself into concern for others
Only by giving can you find a sense of belonging
Ways to achieve a sense of community
self-acceptance
Affirmative optimism means actively changing the things that can be changed and accepting the things that cannot be changed.
trust in others
Trust others unconditionally without considering whether others will repay you.
(This point is highly controversial and difficult to achieve in reality) (My understanding: Conditionally choose the person you want to trust. After being betrayed, you will no longer trust the same person. Instead, you should leave unconditional trust to the person who deserves it. )
necessity
If you can't do this, you won't be able to experience the feeling of happiness. If you blindly doubt other people's thoughts, you won't be able to build a deep relationship with anyone.
Contribution of others (important)
The essence of work is the contribution of others, and self-worth is achieved by serving others
Contribution by others is the only way to achieve happiness
Life is a series of moments, the most important thing is "this moment"